My Child Wants to Dye Their Hair
There are a lot of things that parents have to worry about when their children enter the pre-teen and teenage years. Peer pressure, friends you don’t like, drugs, and alcohol are things that concern parents. What do you do if your child wants to dye their hair?
With all of the other things that teens could be getting involved in, a child wanting to dye their hair is the least of your worries. Before telling your child they can’t dye their hair, ask them some questions:
* Is the reason you want to dye your hair because your friends are doing it?
* What color do you want to dye it?
* Have you checked into whether dying your hair would be safe?
* If you don’t like the way it turns out, will you dye it back or leave it?
* Do you feel dying your hair will affect the way others think about you?
Some children want to dye their hair because they think it’s cool. Their friends or their favorite star may have dyed hair. They may feel dying their hair will help them fit in.
Other children want to dye their hair to get attention. Wanting attention, no matter if it’s positive or negative, is part of the reason why teenagers are into gothic styles. They want people to look at them; they crave the attention.
Another reason why pre-teens and teenagers want to dye their hair is to exert some sense of independence. This is a common occurrence for children at these ages. They feel they have to pull themselves from their parents in order to become who they are supposed to be when they grow up.
Choose your battles when it comes to your pre-teen and teenagers. With all of the other things your child could choose to become involved in, dying their hair is not worth fighting about. How would you feel if they told you they wanted access to some form of birth control? That does help you put things into perspective.
Try to understand their reasoning for wanting to dye their hair. And even though this may seem like odd advice, unless they want to do something drastic or dangerous, let them. Their hair will grow out.
It’s more important to maintain a good relationship with your child than to worry about what they look like on the outside. If they are still basically the same child, their outward appearance shouldn’t be an issue.
If you’re concerned about your child wanting to dye their hair, try to put things into perspective. In the long run, as long as they are still compliant in other areas, their hair color is really a non-issue. Let them experiment with their hair color; they could be asking for cosmetic surgery instead.
My daughter just turned 13 and is over the really crazy hair dying. For the most part. We dyed her hair the first time at around 11. I really had no reason why we couldn’t do it. I don’t want to fight silly battles that my parents caused.
Now she hangs with girls that would be considered goth. She made a big stink about dying her hair back to natural color. lol And honestly her grades have never been higher. She’s at a 3.4 and I never talk to her about her homework. The girls she hangs with do their homework and that’s just the way it is. They play sports and they like to be different.
I am happy that her girlfriends are so positive in her life and that they will talk to me too. I’ll pick my battles, but it will be about other things.
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1I am with you on this Val. My 17yo has had about every color hair known to man…lol She maintains a 3.6 GPA, is heavily active in the church and is overall a great kid. I truly dont care what color she colors it so long as the grades remain the smae (lol)
2ahhhhhh- thankfully this has not been an issue in our house yet but it sounds like I would have to give up some of my “what will people think”ness to get through the next 6 years!
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3Hee hee- Yes, I find that many parents get into the trap of “what will people think”ness. It is very easy to do. I know for a fact that people look at my African American Daughter with her Afro, Rock & Roll clothes and Purple hair and wonder what in the world I am raising. But ya’ know what… that ok
4There are much bigger things to worry about than purple hair. I’d probably be grateful if that was my largest concern! Purple hair is temporary. Just like my kids wearing their clothes inside-out, backward and mismatched. LOL!
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5I’ve already let my kids (7 and 5 now) put blue color in their hair so when they are teens I don’t think I’ll worry much. And hey, when I was a teen my Mom helped me dye my hair! Definitely a go with the flow kind of parent here.
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6Love your blog Keep em coming you’ve got a fan:)
7Interesting read! I also found something similar you may want to check out, its about getting GPA Scholarships with just having a 2.5 GPA or higher.
Check it out on the link here and let me know what you think!
- All the best
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